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ใครที่ตามเพจเขียนไว้ให้เธอตั้งแต่ต้นก็คงพอทราบว่าผมเริ่มเขียนเพจนี้ด้วยจุดประสงค์หลักคือเขียนเก็บไว้ให้ลูกสาวสองคนอ่านตอนเขาเริ่มทำงาน เขียนไปเขียนมาก็เลยกลายเป็นชุมชนขนาดใหญ่ แต่ทุกบทความที่เขียน ไม่ว่าจะเขียนดีหรือไม่ ก็จะตั้งใจเขียนเผื่อลูกสาวเข้ามาอ่านในอนาคตทุกครั้ง..
ก็ไม่ได้คิดว่าลูกสาวจะเขียนบ้าง แต่เมื่อวันก่อนลูกสาวคนโตซึ่งเรียนอยู่ปีสามที่อเมริกาต้องทำงานส่งครูในลักษณะเป็นบทสัมภาษณ์ ก็เลยชวนผมคุย เริ่มต้นตั้งแต่รูปที่ผมอุ้มเขาตอนเด็ก แล้วก็เลยกลายเป็นบทสัมภาษณ์ข้างล่าง
เราคุยกันพ่อลูกภาษาไทยธรรมดานะครับ แต่งานต้องส่งเป็นภาษาอังกฤษ ลูกสาวเลยไปเรียบเรียงใหม่ อ่านแล้วก็แอบปลื้มตามประสาพ่อว่าเขาเป็นคนเขียนหนังสือดีใช้ได้ และในใจความนั้นก็น่าจะมีประโยชน์ที่จะเผยแพร่ต่อ รวมถึงเอามาปะไว้เผื่อเขาได้เข้ามาอ่านในอนาคตตามเจตนารมณ์เดิมอีกด้วย
ใครสะดวกอ่านอะไรยาวๆเป็นภาษาอังกฤษก็เรียนเชิญนะครับ ไม่สะดวกก็ของดดราม่า งดเม้นแรงๆ ซักเม้นนะครับผม :)
When I first planned this interview with my dad, I thought I’d be asking mostly about his career—how he built his life from outside of Bangkok to a long-term position in the city.
As a professional interviewer with his own podcast, who’s met and spoken with a wide range of people, I figured he’d have a lot of interesting perspectives—and he definitely does. That’s what I originally wanted to focus on.
But as we talked, the conversation naturally shifted into something more personal: the story of a health scare in his late 30s that completely changed how he lives.
What stood out to me wasn’t just the story itself, but how he told it. His experience as an interviewer really came through—he knew how to pace his thoughts, how to build a moment, and how to share something emotional in a way that still felt intentional.
What started with a question about an old photo became a much deeper reflection on fear, discipline, and the moment that forced him to rethink his entire approach to life.
…..
Monet: I saw an old photo of yours. I feel like you used to be a lot bigger compared to now. I am just wondering, when you were at the peak of your weight. What was that like?
Dad: The photo you saw was probably the one where I was holding you. You were maybe around 3 or 4 years old then. At that time, I was probably at my heaviest—close to 100 kilograms. And I’m about 175 cm tall, so that’s… a lot. Right now I’m around 80 kg.
Just think about the difference.
I was around 36 or 37. Before that, I wasn’t heavy—when I got married, I was around 80kg, same as now. But after working at DTAC, with all the parties and late nights, plus no exercise since college, it just built up. I didn’t think I needed it—I felt fine.
But when I got really big, I started to feel more irritable—short-tempered. That was about it. I didn’t feel sick or anything.
Another bad habit of mine was eating. I had a really unhealthy diet. I didn’t eat vegetables—like, ever. I absolutely hated them. Even just a single bean sprout, I’d push it aside. I loved khao kha moo, all the fat.
I loved foie gras. I loved buffets. I ate a lot. It all just keeps adding up. And I was working a lot too.but I didn’t feel like anything was seriously wrong.
Monet: How about when your weight was at the peak? Was it long like the period that you were very heavy?
Dad: It went on for a few years. I just kept getting bigger… almost hit 100 kilograms. And then there was this one event—probably the most critical moment in my life.
Monet: And what was it? That event?
Dad: That day… it was like everything had built up and finally exploded. I was overweight, my body was weak, I was under a lot of stress. I had so much work, barely any sleep. And I still remember it clearly—that day, I went to a buffet for lunch at the Oriental Hotel.
Then in the evening, I had another plan… another buffet. Two buffets in one day. And I ate a lot.
By the evening, .my heart started acting strange—like, the rhythm felt off. I got scared. So I told the others I had to go home. I had a driver, and in the car, I tried to sleep it off. I tried to calm down. But it wouldn’t stop. My heart just kept pounding—nonstop. I started to get really scared that I was having a heart attack. So I told the driver to turn and head to the nearest hospital.
By the time we got there, it was already 8 PM. The cardiologist wasn’t in, so they sent me to the ER. They called the heart doctor and moved me to the CCU—the ICU for heart patients. That’s when it got critical. Critical. Like… coma-level serious.
I was shocked—like, what? First time I ever go to the hospital, and I’m already in the CCU?
That night, I couldn’t sleep at all. My mind was racing. I kept thinking: Am I going to die? My daughter’s still so young. I have a good career. How can I die like this? Just from being fat? I was ashamed of myself.
Monet: Was that really your first time ever in the hospital?
Dad: Yeah, yeah it was.
Monet: So normally you never went to the hospital at all?
Dad: Never. I had never stayed overnight in a hospital before—never.
That night, aside from just thinking Why? Why am I so afraid of dying?, there was another thought that popped into my head: I’m just unlucky. Because my friends—same age, some of them were just as overweight as me—but nothing ever happened to them. So why… why was it me?
Why was I the unlucky one? I just kept thinking that all night: I’m unlucky.
The next morning, they took me to see a cardiologist. Turns out, I didn’t have heart disease. But the doctor said there were a lot of other problems—fatty liver, high cholesterol, signs of early diabetes.
Basically, for someone who was only 37, my body looked terrible. Then the doctor sent me home.
But the problem was… it didn’t go away.
After the CCU, I had trauma. I kept checking for those symptoms, thinking they were coming back. Even trying to go to work triggered the same fear. I was scared I’d have a heart attack at work. At one point, I could only manage to go in twice a week.
So I went to see two or three different heart doctors. They all said it wasn’t a heart condition. One of them said it might be psychological—something like panic disorder. I looked it up and it’s a mental condition, where you’re constantly afraid of dying. It can come from trauma.
I didn’t know how to fix it. Some people said it comes from the mind. Told me to try meditating. But that didn’t work—my body was too fat and too weak.
When you’re in a situation like that… you start blaming everything. Everything but yourself.
When your body’s healthy, you think about so many reasons for things—your reputation, your status, money—your mind’s full of explanations. But when you’re sick, there’s only one thing that matters: How do I get better? Everything else disappears. Work? I didn’t care. I just wanted to get better. That’s all.
That’s when it hit me: being fat and being weak—I had to fix both. The first step was losing weight. I started reading books. And honestly, losing weight isn’t that hard… if you really want to. It’s just that I didn’t have the willpower back then.
But you know, it’s about cutting sugar, cutting carbs…
Monet: Sounds like you were trying to avoid it for a long time, huh?
Dad: Yeah… deep down, I already knew.
Monet: It’s hard to really come to terms with it, isn’t it?
So I started eating vegetables. I had never eaten vegetables in my life. When I first started, I literally had to read a book while eating, just to distract myself—because I hated it so much. I’d pretend the veggies were like… grass or something. I packed boxes of fruits and vegetables and completely cut out sugar. That was one part.
The other part was the weakness. People told me, You’ve got to exercise. The easiest way was just to put on my shoes and start running. There’s a road right outside the house, so I went out for a jog. That first day? I only made it 300 meters. That’s nothing—but I was exhausted. I didn’t know what else to do besides those two things. So I just kept going.
From 300 meters, I worked up to 500… then to a full kilometer. I kept eating vegetables. After about a month, I started feeling better. Probably because I had already lost some weight. And when you run, your heart gets stronger. Then your brain checks in again—Am I about to have a heart attack?—and it goes, Hmm, not really. And that built my confidence. The panic attacks started fading.
It began to feel like… Yeah, this is the right path.
After about three months, I could run from 100 meters to five kilometers. I never thought I could do that. Even when I was a kid, I think the farthest I’d ever run was maybe two kilometers.
Eventually, my weight dropped from nearly 100 to 80. My body felt lighter. And the symptoms went away.
But after running for a while, I got overconfident. I thought, Eh, maybe I can stop now.And that’s when the symptoms came back. That’s when I realized—I can’t afford to be fat anymore. I can’t afford to be weak.
I was so scared of those symptoms. That fear became my reason for sticking with it. And now… it’s been about 15 or 16 years. I actually kept records. I’ve run nearly 20,000 kilometers by now.
If you break it down, I run about five times a week. Each time, I run nearly five kilometers. So it adds up. If you calculated the calories, it’d be millions by now.
If all of that had still been in my body—I probably wouldn’t be here today.
And now I’m 56. If you ask me, I hardly get sick at all anymore. Compared to before, when I was weak all the time… Now I’m strong.
When I go to reunions with old classmates, I feel kind of proud—because most people my age aren’t doing so well. Some have diabetes, some need wheelchairs… In our group, I might actually be the strongest one left.
And when I look back, I realize something— If I had gotten sick when I was 50 instead of 37… I probably wouldn’t have been able to turn things around. I might’ve ended up just like them.
So then who was actually the unlucky one? Back then, they were overweight like I was, but they were “lucky” nothing happened. Now they’re the ones suffering. And me? I got “unlucky” back then—but it made me strong now.
So I started thinking—maybe that “bad day” I had…was actually a good day in disguise. Because that crisis came early, I got the chance to wake up.
And once I woke up, I gained so much.
I learned how to control my diet. I lost weight. I discovered running.
And running didn’t just make me physically stronger—it taught me something really important: discipline.
Running was the only thing in my life that gave me real discipline.
But from that, I understood how powerful discipline really is—
In the end, that might be the most valuable life lesson I’ve ever learned.
Monet: Like a blessing in disguise?
Dad: Exactly. I’m really thankful for that day now.
Imagine if I had just slept it off in the car, rubbed on some balm, and gone home…Good thing we turned into the hospital.
Monet: It’s kind of a good thing you panicked a little back then, right? It actually helped, didn’t it?
Dad: Yeah, it made me turn into the hospital. And it was good that the doctor sent me to the CCU— that really jolted my thinking.
It made me realize things. So yeah… I’ve got to thank that bad day in disguise for showing up when it did.
Monet: I have a question—it might not be super related, but… You said before that you really didn’t like vegetables. But now you eat way more than I do! Do you think you’ve actually grown a taste for them? Or is it more like… you just feel like you have to?
Dad: Ah, if you’re asking whether I like eating vegetables now—or whether I like running… I still hate both just as much as I did before. I don’t like vegetables at all. But I know… I don’t even think of vegetables as food. To me, they’re medicine. They’re what saved my life.
Like, if I’ve been eating a lot of heavy food, I’ll purposely make one meal full of vegetables. Because I know it’s good for me. Now, I can eat them. It’s not that I enjoy the taste—I just don’t need to read a book anymore while eating them.
I mean… I watch my iPad instead now. (Monet laughs) But yeah, I can eat them now.
As for running—honestly, I’ve never liked running. But I do it every morning.
I think what I enjoy is the sense of accomplishment. The pride that I kept it up.
But while I’m running? I never enjoy it. Never.
What I do love is how I feel after the run—fresh, awake. If I don’t run, I feel off for the whole day. But during the run? I’d rather stay in bed every single morning.
Still, it’s something I’ve come to understand deeply. There’s this runner, Kipchoge—he’s the best marathoner in the world—and he once said,
“Discipline brings freedom.”
And that quote really stayed with me. Because it made me understand what freedom really means. Kipchoge said: If you don’t have discipline, you become a slave—to your passions, your desires, your greed, your cravings.
That was me. I was a slave to food, to comfort. And it made me sick.
So now I really believe that discipline leads to freedom.
If you ask me, I think there are three kinds of freedom that discipline gives you: First, physical freedom.
If you want to be able to go anywhere, travel, move around, and not depend on anyone—you need to take care of your body.
That means discipline in exercise.
Second, financial freedom.
If you want to have enough money, not struggle, have freedom with how you live—you need to be disciplined with your spending.
Save before you spend. Don’t gamble. Be smart with your money.
Third, freedom of time.
If you want time for your kids, time to do what you love—you need discipline in how you use your time.
Don’t waste it scrolling through TikTok. Do what really matters.
So in the end, that dumb, terrible day…
That “bad day” taught me discipline.
And that discipline became one of the most important guiding principles in my life.
You could even call it my mental model.
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